References

I remember Ryan’s mother as she walked into the dojang for the first time, an apprehensive 8 year old in tow. “Maybe you can help,” she begins. “My Ryan is a good boy but lately it seems he is just out of control. He won’t listen to me any more, doesn’t do his chores and his homework. Is there any thing you can do?

Or Melissa’s father, pulling a wide eyed 6yr old through the door, “This child needs to be more aggressive. She needs to learn how to stand up for herself. You teach that right?”

Or Jared’s grandmother saying, ”He needs to be able to focus. He’s so scatterbrained…does his homework but doesn’t turn it in. Look at him now.” I look at the 10 year old staring at the class in session, obviously seeing himself flying through the air in a gravity defying series of kicks. And I smile.

I smile each time a parent laments about some perceived flaw in their child. And I get to smile a lot. These conversations have repeated themselves so many times over the last 10 years. I have been asked to teach focus, self-defense, self-control, discipline, self-discipline, respect, TaeKwon-Do (although less often for this), aggressiveness, physical coordination, and physical skills (kicking, jumping, and such).

My answer is always, “Of course we teach _______(fill in the blank). We do teach self-control, discipline and respect. As a matter of fact, it’s on the wall right there between the flags.” And I point to the Tenets of TaeKwon-Do:

Courtesy

Integrity

Perseverance

Self Control

Indomitable Spirit

“We recite the tenets of TaeKwon-Do before every class. As a matter of fact I recite them before my private classes with Grandmaster Grasso. We believe these words guide us on our journey outside the dojang. They keep us on track in a world where character is no longer considered an important attribute in a person’s being.”

And so the journey begins. With that first step, the opening of that door, a trek down a lifetime of practice. But a journey to where, to become what?

I have had thousands of conversations with prospective students and their parents. And in all those conversations, never once has any one ever asked me to teach their child peace. Or to be more peaceful, or to be a spiritual warrior, or a peacemaker. Perhaps the thought of the contradiction between Martial and Art is already enough. After all, Art is beauty and harmony, how can war and violence find a center in Art. And now we are going to add peace? What is peaceful about learning a MARTIAL art? A punch, a kick, a series of deadly combinations ending in the incapacitation of your opponent is somehow going to be peaceful?

Yet General Choi Hong Hi states that the ultimate purpose of TaeKwon-Do is:

To eliminate fighting by discouraging the stronger’s oppression of the weaker with a power that must be based on humanity, justice, morality, wisdom, and faith, thus helping to build a better and more peaceful world.

And in the student oath, we promise:

I shall obey the Tenets of TaeKwon-Do

I shall respect the instructor and seniors

I shall never misuse TaeKwon-Do

I will be a champion of freedom and justice

I WILL BUILD A MORE PEACEFUL WORLD

An oath is a promise. We are promising to build a more peaceful world. So how do we teach peace in the context of martial arts? What message do we convey when we teach our students to kick vital targets, strike killing blows, destroy joints and generally commit mayhem upon another human being? “To win the victory with a single blow” is the objective of TaeKwon-Do, certainly doesn’t sound very peaceful, on the surface.

Our journey begins with the word: Peace. Peace is often seen as weakness, or surrender, or some handholding, sing around the campfire sort of “feel-good” absence of conflict. I disagree whole-heartedly. Peace is a verb. An action word. It is not the absence of conflict. Louise Diamond, in The Courage for Peace, defines peace as:

…a more active pursuit of a dynamic state of social and economic justice, environmental integrity, human rights, and empowered processes of governance and development for the benefit of all, not merely a privileged few. (Pgs 25, 6)

Diamond continues:

Synonyms of the word peace in my thesaurus point in three directions: one having to with order, harmony, and unity; one having to do with calm, tranquility, and equanimity; and one having to do with agreement, accord, and rapport. (Pg. 26)

From the very beginning the student is taught the importance of order and unity. He lines up according to rank order. That is, from senior to junior, from black belt to white belt. He is united with his peers by virtue of wearing a uniform. He is accepted and honored for beginning his journey the group moves an inter-related unit. One that has strife and conflict, yet as Joe Hyams says in Zen in the Martial Arts:

A dojo is miniature cosmos where we make contact with ourselves---our fears, anxieties, reactions, and habits. It is an arena of confined conflict where we confront an opponent who is not an opponent but rather a partner engaged in helping us understand ourselves more fully. (Pg 4)

In this understanding we begin to see the light of harmony. When we begin to understand ourselves, our feelings, our core human needs, we can begin to understand our fellow human beings needs. This insight leads us onto the path of compassion and of peace. We see the necessity of being in harmony with our classmates and with ourselves. This “right” order creates a feeling of calm and centeredness, a sense of peace, of place in the universe.

On the first day the student begins his martial arts training he is introduced to a sometimes-foreign concept—mindfulness. We introduce this idea by way of sitting meditation at the end of class. Sitting “zazen” begins to calm the students mind, quieting the conscious “monkey mind”. He is instructed to sit quietly and breathe consciously. Sitting still in the body, allowing thought to flow in and out, with out attachment, allowing emotion to wash away on the tides of non-duality, all is calm and tranquil. In serenity we bring the student back to center, back to himself, the self that is free of judgment, criticism and blame. In this process the student becomes aware of his connection to the universe, that his ki and the ki of the universe are related. Scott Shaw in The Warrior is Silent states:

This understanding leads the practitioner to the next level of refined understanding, that of forming a conscious link between the body, mind, and the positive spiritual energy of the universe. (Pg. 3)

When the student is calm and tranquil he is an outward manifestation of peace. Mindfulness has the student facing inward, calm and assured, and facing outward into the universe, calm and assured. His training allows him to be confident in his ability to confront the universe on an energetically calm and serene manner. His ki is the ki of the universe. They are one and the same. This is peace in action…to attack him is to attack the universe. The ripple effect of this pool of serenity creates a feeling of satisfaction in the student, and his immediate circle of contacts, and then out to the universe as a whole.

Finally, we look for agreement and accord as a piece in our peace puzzle. My classmates and I must be in integrity with one another. After all, he is punching and kicking at my vital spots, and I at his. If one of us is out of integrity, out of harmony with the other, the results could be disastrous. We must have an understanding of the relationship between us. Am I angry, is he punching too hard, overstepping our previously agreed upon boundaries? Am I out of integrity by allowing his behavior to grow unchecked? After all I am the one responsible for my feelings, my actions, and my thoughts. For peace to be achieved all of us must agree to be related, and must agree to the lines and edges of our relationship. When I walk into the dojang I walk in integrity, and when I walk out, I walk out with my integrity intact. The beginning student learns early on the importance of integrity in his dealings with his classmates. He finds himself looking in after being called on his integrity. And when he looks in he sees the mirror of his relationship with himself and his world. This mirror reflects his future both in and out of integrity. We find the student who refuses to look inside into the looking glass of integrity does not stay long. The gaze of his classmates into his lack of integrity is too intense and too internally hurtful to continue. He must adopt a posture of integrity to continue a relationship with his classmates. In this way he comes into accordance with himself, his training partners and his universe. A peaceful man is a man at peace with his actions, thoughts, and emotions.

We embark on the path of peace from the first step on the martial arts journey. This path winds it’s way around many benchmarks. Finding unity and harmony when lining up and donning the dobok. Realizing that mindfulness exists in an animate universe and that I have an integral part in the expanding ki of the universe. Seeing myself in the eyes of my partner, and realizing that our mutual agreement allows us to create the safety and rapport necessary to expand our knowledge of the universe and ourselves.

Yes, I will teach your child focus, self-confidence, self-defense, discipline and respect, among other things. But when it is all said and done my mission is to return to you a person at peace with himself. One who is at peace with his classmates and all the people in his life. At peace with his universe and the energy he is responsible for in that universe. For then he will walk in the world a true warrior, a peace warrior, a spiritual warrior. He has become a person of integrity, courtesy, perseverance, self-control, and indomitable spirit. The architect building a more peaceful world, one in which fighting is eliminated and where all persons are living free and justly.